“Is this the End?” Chase asked me yesterday as he looked around the room. I was puzzled why he asked this, prompting him to ask again; “Is this the end?” In that moment I lived life – from then till my death. Life played out on fast forward. With in seconds, my thoughts raced to being lowered six feet down. His little voice asking a sincere question will now haunt me till I meet my own end.
It didn’t scare me, more extreme sadness that I will one day leave them. I prayed to God, or the higher powers of the Universe like always. Shortly after, a post of mine displayed in my memories.
7 years aqo, I found and posted a Prayer that today hits just as it did; the La Prière du Para (The Paratrooper’s Prayer), a French poem found in the possession of the presumed author, André Zirnheld, upon his death in Libya on July 27, 1942.
“I’m asking You God, to give me what You have left.
Give me those things which others never ask of You.
I don’t ask You for rest, or tranquility.
Not that of the spirit, the body, or the mind.
I don’t ask You for wealth, or success, or even health.
All those things are asked of You so much Lord,
that you can’t have any left to give.
Give me instead Lord what You have left.
Give me what others don’t want.
I want uncertainty and doubt.
I want torment and battle.
And I ask that You give them to me now and forever Lord,
so I can be sure to always have them,
because I won’t always have the strength to ask again.
But give me also the courage, the energy,
and the spirit to face them.
I ask You these things Lord,
because I can’t ask them of myself.” – André Zirnheld
I still feel the same way. I ask to give me the strength to battle the horrors of life so that my children do not have to. Let life wash over them and let them experience the beauty of your creation. Please let their smiles, laughs, and love never fade.